From the Outside Looking in

Right now, I am freezing. Q has yet again given me a cold so I am shivering, my muscles hurt, and my throat feels raw. Q passed this wonderful cold to me last Sunday when we went to a friend's house for dinner. I should have known Q was sick because he was quiet and very well behaved. My friend has two kids under four. Whenever I visit families with multiple kids I always judge if I will be a good mother for more than one kids.
From the outside looking in, having multiple kids seems terrible. They seem to be always kicking each other or one is crying while the other is laughing maniacally. Last Saturday, we went to a botancial garden with another friend and her two children. We had a lovely day together but I could see how exhausted she was by the end of the day.
I have finished reading Toddler Adoption and scour the Internet for tips on adopting a older child. But no one can talk me through what it will be like to juggle two kids. Lately, I have been looking at a pair of adorable two-year-old twins on the SWAN website. Three kids! Kevin asked if I was crazy, but I caught him looking at the twins' picture, too.
Everyday I wait for the call from the social worker so we can begin this next journey. Every time the phone rings I wonder will this be the call. I so want that call, but I am also terrified by the thought of multiple kids in my house, all trying to drive me crazy.